The King's Church in Ilford
Reading: 1Thess 4:1-7
A vicar found his bike missing one day, and was incensed with the thought that someone from his congregation had stolen it. So as a response, he started to do a series on the Ten Commandments with a view to homing in on the 8th Commandment "Thou shalt not steal." However, when he got to the 7th Commandment, "Thou shalt not commit adultery", he stopped in mid flow because he suddenly remembered where he'd left his bike!
We laugh at the unexpected in this situation, but the fact is we need to take immorality much more seriously. It destroys trust, breaks up families, spreads desease, brings unwanted children into the world, and is the cause of enormous emotional pain. It undermines character, and destroys ministries. Paul comes at it here from a positive angle, with a reminder that now we are those who live to please God, not ourselves anymore. He had clearly done a great discipling job if in three weeks he'd taught the new Believers at Thessalonica about holy living as well as the basics of their salvation. But he didn't give them a set of rules to observe; rather he taught them how to please God. This is the way of grace not law. Nevertheless he did give them instructions about how to live under grace; and he made it clear this kind of living is not optional. He says "Look, I'm giving you these instructions with all the authority of the Lord Jesus. If He was here, He'd say the same thing." If you're curious as to what those instructions were, have a read of Ephesians 4:17 onwards and Colossians 3 & 4.
He goes on to say, "It is God's Will that you should be sanctified..." This is one of those jargon words that has a bad press. It means to be made holy, but we often mix it up with 'sanctimonious' which is a holier than thou attitude. Real holiness is to be like Jesus. He was totally given over to serving His Father, and totally pure in thought and deed. That's what it is to be holy.
I find people get confused by this because we don't feel very holy, and yet the bible tells us we have been made holy through the blood of Christ. We need to see this from a heavenly perspective, and an earthly one. If you died today, as a Believer you will go straight into the presence of Jesus, and you will be morally perfect as you do so. That's the heavenly perspective. The earthly perspective is that we are growing in holiness day by day, but we will go on struggling with sin and temptation for the rest of our lives.
So why bother? Sometimes I feel that the amount of progress towards holiness that I'm going to make in this life is so insignificant that I might as well wait until I get to glory and let Jesus do it all at once! Ever felt like that? Well, there are three reasons why we should bother:
1. It pleases God when we live holy lives. Just as you as parents are delighted when your children are good and behave themselves, so is God our Father delighted in us when we show His character.
2. God wants us to show the world what He is like. We are God's witness to the world. We are all that people might ever see of Jesus. That's an awesome thought, and puts a great responsibility on us.
3. We'll be much more effective in our mission if we can show that God is real by living it out. The power of the Spirit will be able to flow more freely. We'll be able to hear what He says much more easily; and our availability will make us more obedient.
Three good reasons to live out holy lives. But then Paul homes in on what is a major issue for the Thessalonians - Sexual immorality. If you think we've got problems in our society - and we have - it was much worse then. Idol worship was the norm, along with fertility cults that made sex an integral part of their worship ceremonies. In Corinth, they worshipped Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of sex and beauty, and her servants were sent out into the streets at night as prostitutes. Thessalonica was no better. The problem was that temple worship was closely linked to trade guilds. So if you trained as a wood carver, you worshipped at the temple dedicated to the god of woodcarvers, and your work life and social life revolved around the temple. Pulling out of that when you became a Christian meant not only ostracism, but starvation because you would no longer be able to work.
Nevertheless, it was vital to the survival of the church, that Christians did come out of those practices and live pure and moral lives. Let me at this point, define immorality. From a biblical point of view, it is any sexual practice that goes on outside of marriage between a man and a woman. For two single people to have sex is fornication. For a married person to have sex with someone other than their marriage partner is adultery. Both are sinful; and, despite our government's attempts to redefine the Bible, so is Homosexuality.
So Paul teaches these new Believers how God intended sex to be expressed. God's not against sex - He invented it, as the most intimate celebration of the relationship between a husband and his wife. Because it is such a precious and delicate gift, it needed to be protected within the boundaries of marriage. When Paul says avoid sexual immorality in v. 3, it's a much stronger word than 'avoid' implies. "Cut it out!" "Run away from it" is much nearer its meaning.
V. 4 is the most difficult verse in Thessalonians to translate, because literally it translates: "Every one of you should know how to possess his own vessel in holiness and honour." Most modern Bibles take 'vessel' to be referring to our own body, so it's translated "learn to be self-controlled" - and there's no doubt that's good biblical principle. However, if you're reading from the RSV, it says, "each of you should know how to take a wife in holiness and honour." The problem is that the word to 'possess' means to acquire, to get, - and it's difficult to apply that to our own bodies because we already have them.
The context too would support this translation. Paul's saying in effect. "Let each of have their own wife or husband. Don't go round pinching someone else's." John Stott puts forward several other arguments for understanding the verse this way. So how do you take a wife (or husband) in holiness and honour?
I'm going to be really radical here, and say: "Not the way we do it in our western culture!" What happens a lot of the time today is both young men and women go to a party say, and see someone they fancy, so he asks her to dance - usually. Dance is the euphemism given these days for the smooching that that is usually intended to end up in bed. Thus sex has become the reason for the relationship, rather than the celebration of it. Let's suppose that this relationship lasts more than one night, and they start "seeing" quite a lot of each other. The problem is this: the relationship is being based on physical attraction, rather than what they have in common, shared values, wanting the same things out of life, and genuine affection and concern for the other's interests. They may be physically compatible, but in other ways they are incompatible. [A divorce court lawyer was talking to his friend....] As a leader once said to a group of us, "What are you going to do for the other 23hrs of the day?!"
I want to show you this diagram which illustrates what I'm saying...
It is typical of many modern relationships. The (emotional)cost is rising because there is no blending. Blending is low because communication is low. The physical aspect is going great, until it peaks and falls off. The reason for this is that romantic love cannot be sustained without an underlying friendship. Friendships develop when there is adequate exploration to know each other. When this exploration is conducted mainly through the "Braille" system, knowledge is limited to the body. Communication draws to a standstill when the couple find themselves in a lip-lock!
A godly courtship is described in the second diagram. Physical intimacy and (emotional)cost are low, while communication and blending are high. This works for Christian and non-Christian, but for the Christian it's vital that the person you're seeking to marry is a Christian also. How can you have the depth of relationship God intends if you're unable to share your deepest thoughts and aspirations with your partner? You'll find yourselves pulling in different directions a lot of the time.
To take a wife with honour means that we don't take someone else's; and this is what Paul is trying to get over in verse 6. We are not to wrong our brothers (or sisters) in this. Paul doesn't mince his words. "The Lord will punish men (and women) for all such sins.." Paul doesn't say how, but I would think sexual desease must have been rampant in those days. Certainly there will be a reckoning at the Last Day, but a lot of God's punishment is built into life, and is simply a consequence of our wrongdoing.
This is not the life that God wants for us. He wants our good. He wants us to be full of his peace and joy. I believe His desire is for us to be healthy. He wants strong marriages and secure families. That's the way society will prosper. It certainly isn't the way we're doing it at the moment. So if you're sitting here thinking, "Hey Robin, this is a bit strong isn't it. God can't have meant it like you're saying..", be careful. You're in danger of rejecting not what I'm saying, but God Himself. You need to repent of thoughts like that, and you need to repent of all sexual immorality and impurity in your life. Let's do it now.