Life Groups

Building A Community Church

We want to: 1. Become community (team?) that is an expression of Jesus. (Eph 4:16)

2. Become a family (Eph 2:19)

3. Build friendships.

4. Be of practical support to each other.

5. Generate a lifestyle that goes beyond weekly meetings.

We want to fulfil the New Commandment to "love one another as I have loved you. By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love one for another."

Think About ways that we can demonstrate this love for one another.

Think about how you would define fellowship?

As a believer, with which of the following people is it possible for you to have fun, build a friendship, or experience fellowship? [Put an (imaginery!) tick against all that apply]

Fun Friendship Fellowship

We won't become this Community or "expression of Jesus" overnight.

We have to start by:

[It's OK to play a game sometimes! - "Lardi-dar" etc. ]
  • Making people feel welcome and accepted!
  • Getting to know one another.
  • Building A Sense of Belonging
  • Supporting each other in times of need
  • Having fun together.
  • Making friends, and become a community in and out of your Life Group.
  • Developing the ministry of hospitality.

    What makes you feel welcome at a Life Group?

    • Someone to greet you.
    • Being involved in the conversation
    • Inclusive chair arrangement
    • People interested in you (but not too OTT!)
    • Warm house.

    How Can We Start Building Community Within The Life Group?

  • Conversation! Take responsibility to get people talking together.
  • Listen! Show you've remembered what people said
  • Play games - they get people relaxed with each other.
  • Have meals together.
  • Throw searching questions into the conversation, perhaps on topical issues.
  • Encourage each other with warm words of affirmation.
  • Encourage each other to step out in faith re gifts, situations, issues, etc.
  • Pray for those with needs, but don't let this take over the group.
  • Pray and study together.
  • Encourage honesty and openness. (You may have to set the tone!)
  • Have socials.

    This all takes preparation and forethought.

    We have to encourage people to learn to trust, so that they will feel able to open up. So make it clear that things shared in the Life Group will not go further. (Unless as leader you feel you need to bring the Elders in on a situation. In which case, explain that you don't feel able to handle it, and tell them what you're going to do. It's sometimes better to ask them rather than tell them.)

    Try to avoid this kind of scenario:

    Beware of: Self-sufficiency/ Independence

    Formality & being too formulaic

    Excuses (eg: "I was brought up never to show my feelings")

    One-To-One's"

    Some of the more intimate sharing needs to be done at On-To-One level. Let's try to encourage this. Encourage people to find a "One-To-One" partner, and encourage them to meet up as often as they can - either that or a phone call to find out how you can pray for one another.

    Things to avoid:

  • Children and pets being allowed to be a distraction.
  • Homes where there is tension. (from bad marriage, opposition from unbelieving partner, or undisciplined children)
  • Rooms that are too cold, too hot, formal, and unfriendly
  • Rooms with lots of ornaments and glassware
  • Rooms that are too small to stand up, or sit down together comfortably.
  • Sitting in rows, circles with a second row, or long rooms that naturally tend to divide the group in two.
  • Unplug the phone or put the answer phone on.

    Some of these things we can't do much about, and most of the time we're glad to use any room available! But if there is any flexibility and choice, these are the things to bear in mind.

    • Outside the Life Group
    • Drop in on one another when you can.
    • Phone for a chat.
    • Consider ways we can share our common lives.
    • Minister or Counsel together.
    • Could you have someone as a lodger, and have an extended family?
    • Be ready to lend/give resources (money or goods) as required.
    • Work together:

      Painting a member's house

      Doing maintenance jobs at the KC.

      Tidying someone's garden

      Shopping for someone who's ill.

      Baby-sitting to enable a couple to go out. Etc.

    • Eating together:

      A shared takeaway

      A picnic out in the country

      Going out for a meal.

    • Having fun together:

      A walk in the woods etc.

      A trip to the cinema/ concert

      Watching the rugby/world cup

      Play games together.

    It's difficult to see how we can truly fulfil the "One Anothers" of the NT without embracing the above. But in our busy lives, we do need to be willing to make space for it. Some, eg, see socials as a optional or a waste of time, because they're not "spiritual". We have to show why that's not a balanced outlook. Bear in mind that this kind of community life is better caught, than taught.

    The Cone Nebula - NGC 2264
    Distance from Earth = 2,500 light years
    Cone Diameter = 2.3 light years
    The heavens are telling of the glory of God
    The heavens are telling of the glory of God;
    And their expanse is declaring the work of His hands.    Psalm 19:1